Food Diary,Day 52 : Struggles

FYI:  I almost deleted this entry a couple times, because I am not at the same point I was this morning when I started.  

Movement:  I did an express mile with Leslie Sansone.  I could not bring myself to do more due to my mental block.... but I can do 15 minutes, even when nothing happens for all my efforts!!!  (warning:  stinking thinking attack!)

I am completely, utterly discouraged.  The scales are stuck.  I read about plateauing last night in an old diet book I bought long ago.  Their advice was to do more exercising, get back to basics in my eating. They say that my body has gotten used to what I am doing.  (ugh!) 

The thing is is that I don't want to have to give more effort at this point.  I am doing the maximum I can do right now and obviously it is not good enough.  This is where it gets frustrating.  All my efforts do not seem to add up to enough for my body at the moment.  I am angry.

I am not thinking of giving up, so don't worry.  I do not have that luxury.  What I am thinking of is how to get past this spot without becoming a total depressed mess.

I will just have to focus on the non-scale victories until my efforts reap their due rewards.  

• I feel better (no heartburn)
• My clothes fit better
• I have more energy (when I can sleep at night, its been too hot)
• My whole family is more active
• My whole family is more aware of how eating well is important
• My husband is proud of me

It is just so hard to feel stuck!  Then I watched this...

Thank you, Lisa!  I feel better. I drank some water and did my little 1 mile walk. 



And I thought about the reasons I am on this journey.  It's about getting fit, not loosing weight.  At this point, I feel a bit better.  I kept the above on this post as I want to be able to look back on my struggles and learn from them.  I am not wanting lots of comments telling me to "keep going."  That is not the issue. I am not giving up. I am just figuring how to do this with a "happy heart!" 


And reading this helped, too. 


    Isaiah 40: 28-31

"Have you not known?
      Have you not heard?
      The everlasting God, the LORD,
      The Creator of the ends of the earth,
      Neither faints nor is weary.
      His understanding is unsearchable.
       ²⁹ He gives power to the weak,
      And to those who have no might He increases strength.
       ³⁰ Even the youths shall faint and be weary,
      And the young men shall utterly fall,
       ³¹ But those who wait on the LORD
      Shall renew their strength;
      They shall mount up with wings like eagles,
      They shall run and not be weary,
      They shall walk and not faint."

 So I will walk and not faint!  




I'm in a fight, not physical!    It's mental.  And I am counting on God to help me through this spot. 



Breakfast:  1 cup of bran flakes (I measured) and enough skim milk to cover, coffee

Lunch (My MIL is coming today and taking the kids and I to Pizza Hut.  I dread this lunch as there is nothing at PH that I can really eat.  But my kids love it and so we go.) I stuck to the thin crust.  I had 3 pieces.  I also had a salad full of green peppers, the only vegetable offered on that "salad" bar.  I did not have the gooey chocolate or cinnamon bread sticks! 

Snack:  small protein bar (120 cal.)

Dinner:  grilled steak, corn-on-the-cob, strawberries, 1/2 cup baked beans

Treat:  smaller serving of slow churned ice cream